RACHEL'S BEEN SITED

Archive for the tag “breaking the fourth wall”

A Meditation On God By Her Ink-Spattered Works

A Meditation on God
By Her Ink-Spattered Works

She carved me with ink, with pressure of pen.
Shaped me in smooth strokes, careful arches.
Streaks of sentience and decisive jabs of
completed thought.
Cut me into this world of white,
lines of blue.
I exist on her whim. Every step is hers
to shape.
How can I not love her?

Hate her.

Her clumsy words
clumsy and cruel,
shaped stumbling feet. This malformed nose on a
malformed face.

Was it ignorance that wrote me so?
Ineptitude?
I think I halfway hope so. It makes her
kinder, somehow.
More worthy of my love.

A bumbling queen, well-meaning but inevitably unable to
form me, to
shapemecarveme

create me
into the flawless creature first born in her mind.
That she couldn’t help but try and capture in ink.
And failed.

This weakness I could understand.
Forgive.

But no. No, I think…
she does know.

I remember, once, a time when my nose was straight.

No one else does, of course.
That day is long past.
Scratched from existence, buried under
black lines and angry swirls, replaced with this
Bent
Battered
Broken
Thing.         
The result of an accident, vague and undetermined,
some time in my unexplored past.

And I know it, I know
(though I can’t name how
or why)
that being broken is what broke me.

There was a time when I wasn’t broken.
When she had it right.

So why?

A wordless cry
(of course wordless. No words can be formed without her consent.)
Silent plea, silent request
silent demand:
Explain.
Explain.

I know that you’re watching.
Know that you shaped me.
Malformed face in a
malformed life.

Do you know what you created?
Read through the lines.
Off-key dialogue, stumbling words
(stumbling feet, stumbling world.)
Do you know what you created?
Past smooth, curving U’s,
Bent B’s
The occasional, ugly,
angry X.

Do you know what you created?
Did you shape my bitter soul, too?

An excerpt from the story inspired by this poem can be found HERE.

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